Prague 2024: Guns, Sex, and Rock n Roll
- Rob C
- Apr 15, 2024
- 4 min read
Updated: Aug 21, 2024
Monday
Breakfast at 9:30. Someone is in our usual spot. No problem, Lisa and me find a two seater and get set up with tea, OJ, etc. Breakfast man approaches and leans over to quietly say "they will be going in a minute, we'll set your usual table up for you no problem". What a nice guy. Coffee-machine-gate is a distant memory and mutual respect is in it's place. We relocate and Rob then Ange join us. We have eggs, croissants. Breakfast man comments on Lisa cutting croissant with a knife which seems to have offended his senses and insists she tear them next time. He brings 2 more croissants which we don't really want. I eat one out of politeness, natch.
Today is gun time. Angelique has trouble opening the confirmation of booking pdf on the email. It's through a third party agency. We begin to get the fear that this is not a legit booking 😬. We decide to head over there anyway and see what happens.
The location is a non-descript street with average medium-rise blocks. However there are some people hanging about which is either fellow punters or fellow scam victims. A massive army-type dude bursts out of another door and asks us to go inside. This is Vlado, and he is not to be messed with. We follow downstairs and enter an antechamber. He says make yourself comfortable, have a complimentary drink, fill in forms, sign your life away. He confirms we have paid in full (phew) and leaves the room. Our group consists of 2 Germans, two french, two other English I think, and a yank who is slightly late. The nerves are palpable; a video of soldiers jumping out of planes / lighting up bad guys plays on a loop complete with menacing rock music. After about 15 mins, Vlado storms back in and says "let's go".
We are assigned ranges. 4 ranges of three. Rob, Lisa, Ange are in no. 3, I volunteer to join the Germans in 4. Vlado talks through each gun (about 8 or so, but we're only shooting 3). All come with intricate instruction. Thankfully he says he will explain again when we take our turn. He also says the AK47 maybe too heavy for Lisa and Ange do they will shoot a sub machine gun (Scorpion), which looks really cool with laser scope.
Even with ear-defenders it is LOUD. On the first shot, Ange jumps out of her skin. We take on Glocks first, aiming for the guts. Casings fly out of the chamber and tumble all around us. Don't touch the barrels they are hot. Don't hold your thumb on the back of the Glock or you can rip a tendon. Always keep gun pointing at the front. Check the chamber. AK47/mini machine guns follow. At one point Ange shoots the machine gun and says "F*ck!" and Vlado says "maybe later" with a wry grin. I have this on video btw. Then to finish a pump action shot gun, but no target, just a big block with a face on it in the middle - so everyone gathers to watch you for this one. The French woman is stopped from shooting this for being too dangerous (aiming at floor but not on purpose, just inept). Ange is stopped for not loading the gun "dynamically" enough. Lisa didn't want to do it so I get another 5 shots on it which I feel went ok and Vlado is happy. Vlado was very happy with the Germans who seem to take to shooting quite naturally; he says "Germans are always good at this". He apologises for his "Czechlish" when talking to Rob when he was cracking a joke. Overall he's happy with our group and we all did what we were told. Shooting these guns is very technical, and there's a lot of adrenaline pumping and your arms shake etc. It's not easy.
We really enjoy the time and shake our instructors hands. We have our targets, see below, so have a go and see who you think which one belongs to who!
After shooting we go back to hotel briefly to drop off the targets and have a little break. Then we head out to New City Hall to see if we can get on the paternoster lift. It looks closed but we venture in, feeling like we're trespassing. Lift is out of action ☹️. Then to the Museum of Sex Machines. All I can say about that is that I can share very few pictures because it did not hold back. Nothing was left to the imagination. Here some of the tamer exhibits:
After the sexy sex museum we go the the aptly named Hard Rock Cafe. Food is great and we're stuffed.
My feet are killing me, despite the rest, but we trudge back to the library to see the "column of books". It seemingly always has a large queue outside to see this. We queue to a point and then decide to just take a quick pic from the side and sod off. I didn't even bother but Lisa took a pic.
Then off to see the John Lennon Wall and hunt for Beavers. Apparently the big mural of Lennon has been mostly covered over but there's still some stuff to see.
After seeing Mr Beaver we walk up river and sit, a jazz trumpeter plays from a park bench. The sun is setting. We cross a bridge and see a concert hall, and a statue of Dvorak (he did the Hovis advert tune, aka the New World Symphony). Once back across the river, it rains briefly. We take shelter in an underground Irish bar which we're not expecting to be much but it's a great find - a cavern with booze, Irish music and table service. My phone is on 15% battery at this point, my body battery is about 1% - basically I'm shattered. We head to hotel. So I'll leave you with a gallery of some other pics from the day:
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